Tom and I spoke in church today. Our church is unique, I think, in that there are no paid clergy and it is run entirely by volunteers. As a result the sermons are given by people from the congregation. The bishop gives a topic, perhaps a talk to reference, and the rest is up to the person. I was given this talk, and Tom this one. I really appreciated the opportunity to study the topic of faith this month, and to evaluate my prayer, scripture reading, FHE, and temple attendance.  I tried a new style and used MindNode to write a mind map that I referenced for my talk. I liked that it allowed me to have all the quotes and information I wanted without constraining me to some linear order. I also loved that it allowed me to see all of my information at the same time. (I taped four pieces of paper together to create a large map.) It was a spiritually heightening experience for me. I’m always amazed at how strengthening the bearing of one’s testimony is. One of the thoughts that occurred to me while studying the topic was that we can’t see a tree grow. Faith is compared to a seed by Alma and I love that imagery. I thought a lot about the beauty of trees and how they start out as something so small and yet grow to be something so grand. And yet- that growth is imperceptible in its occurrence. Sure you can see it via time lapse photography, but with the bare eye the growth of a tree is imperceptible. I was touched by the thought that the same is true with us. We often only see growth in ourselves, our children, after the fact- when we look back and compare ourselves with a previous version of ourselves. Because of this, it is easy to undercut certain commandments or practices as being worthless because we don’t “see” their benefit. Science shows that one good meal can change the health of the body for good, and similarly one bad meal will damage the body. We don’t notice how our arteries become clogged as it’s happening, nor do we sense the scrapping and cleaning that a hearty salad produces within us. While I have had  many scripture study sessions and prayers where I immediately feel fed, lifted, improved; I’ve had many others that felt blasé, repetitive. (The fault, my own, of course.) But I’d like to suggest that even if I hadn’t notice the change, it was there.
When I was first given the topic my first thought was. Yikes, I don’t have much faith. When I considered the faith to move mountains, raise people from the dead, I wasn’t sure I matched up. But as I prayed about it I realized that my faith manifests itself in confidence, peace, optimism. I have complete faith that Christ is at the helm of His church. I have faith that he communicates with living prophets and apostles to lead His church on earth. I have faith that whatever happens to me on this earth will be for my eternal good. I have faith that motherhood is an excellent way to progress towards divinity. I have faith in an afterlife. I have faith that my ancestors are alive and active in my life. My faith also manifests itself in a lack of fear. I imagine everyone’s faith shows itself in different ways, but this is where mine shines through. How grateful I am for a God who loves me enough to reassure me and communicate with me continually. He is truly a Loving Father. I have complete faith in Him.